As a Hospice Chaplain and Psychic Medium it continues to amaze me to witness…to be witness…and acknowledge that how we live is how we die. It shows up in various forms…as the emotional always (always) shows up in the physical. We may not ever acknowledge that, but indeed it is truth. Those physical issues that plaque you…indeed are a result of your emotional fears. And in the exact same sense, the health of your body is indeed a result of your emotional ‘love’ or trust.
Working in hospice allows me to witness and support patients and family members during their transition. Being a Psychic Medium in this space allows me to see beyond the physical and know the larger picture. We each have our own journey…and no one outside of self can change that. Being able to see the larger picture helps greatly in being able to hold loving space for the transition instead of getting attached to the need to ‘save’ someone.
Death by digging in his heels.
Digging his heels in his whole life – resisting assistance, taking on all things himself because he feared he was not enough…or would be seen as weak. When he came on to hospice the wounds on his heels were pretty bad but certainly heal-able. Even when told that all he needed to do was stay off of his feet for a bit, or at least raise them while he was sitting, he resisted and refused. His heels stayed on the ground and the wounds became worse. At first he denied the pain…again, refusing any assistance. But now, the wounds are so deep, to the bone in fact, that they are unlikely to heal.
I watch as my Nurse struggles…watching him, wanting to cure and comfort him. He no longer denies the pain. The wounds are now infected. By signing on to hospice he acknowledged and agreed to only comfort measures…which means that antibiotics are not prescribed…but pain meds are. Although these specific wounds are not his hospice diagnosis, they are what will probably take his life. In wanting to cure, the Nurse turns to the Dr to ask for antibiotics. The Dr refuses and the Nurses ability to ‘cure’ has been denied. My heart goes out to my her…and she is furious with the Dr. The Dr, although quite unconscious of it, is allowing the unfolding of the patients journey to occur without the intervention of the Nurse.
With the ability to see beyond the physical I know that he is not to be ‘saved’ by anyone. The lack of antibiotics allows the plan, the patients plan, to unfold naturally. He will die from having dug his heels in his whole life…it is how he lived, and it is how he will die.
The Nurse struggles morally, emotionally…like many of us would. Now that he is in the position to actually swallow a pill if given to him, his Soul has properly stepped in and used the Dr to deny any assistance. Sometimes…most times…more than most times…we cannot ‘save’ another. Their journey is their journey…and for good reason…regardless of what it looks like to us.
Imagine that…dying from an infection from digging in your heels. You can’t get much more profound. Holding on to beliefs that no longer serve us, can most certainly turn to a festering infection which will ultimately take our life.
Honoring his journey, holding space and his hand, letting him know that he is indeed loved allows him to walk his journey with dignity and support…all the way Home.