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Posts Tagged ‘choice’

This weekend I had the opportunity to sit next to a woman during lunch. We were both attending a function in town and this was our lunch break. Of course the conversation turned ‘spiritual’. She was mentioning that she was in a stressful place and trying to decide whether or not to “…hand it over to Holy Spirit” (yes, she is studying A Course In Miracles). Call it what you will, Holy Spirit, God, Universe, etc…they are all the same and she calls It Holy Spirit.

Anyway…I had to laugh…simply because ‘Holy Spirit’ already has it, always has, and always will. Our choice to hand it over hasn’t a damn thing to do with whether or not ‘Holy Spirit’ takes it. The ONLY thing we are holding onto, with our dear life for that matter, is an idea. An idea of how we want our world, a specific situation, a relationship, etc, to look like. And 100% of the time, if we are struggling with that situation (which is why we would hand it over to Holy Spirit) that would clearly indicate that it is not serving us…yet we fight so hard to make it work. Meanwhile, ‘Holy Spirit’ is gently reminding us that there is another way…if only we would let go of the idea that is causing us stress! LOL

Seriously, I had to laugh. Who do we think we’re kidding anyway? Why are we so determined to make our lives (relationships included) look and feel a specific way? (and, it’s a way that nobody is having any luck with to boot.) Because, ‘that way’ is an idea that has been handed down to us through the ages. Nobody, OK, very few people, have questioned, and even fewer have decided not to follow. Talk to those who have decided not to follow the old idea and I guarantee you will find some very happy (Truly happy) people.

Take relationships for example. We (as children) are conditioned with an idea of what relationships are supposed to look like…whether it’s a friendship, romantic relationship, work relationship, etc…and we believe in the promise of what that relationship will bring us so much that we totally give up everything that we are in order to make the relationship work. And I do mean ‘work’, the way we were conditioned to think it works. Here we are, holding on desperately to a relationship with someone else that is obviously not working, while totally letting go of the most important relationship we will ever have…the one with ourselves.

What’s sad is that the relationship goes sour and we then blame ourselves. We continue to self-sacrifice, blame and belittle ourselves (and others) because no matter what we do we just can’t make it ‘work’. Well of course it won’t work! What kills me is that we are so ‘hooked’ on what the promise of that relationship brings us that we totally deny our own Self. And then we wonder why we’re sick and relationships don’t work?

You’ve heard me say it before…at least I think you have…THE MOST IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIP YOU WILL EVER HAVE IS THE ONE YOU HAVE WITH YOURSELF. Yup! Here we are, holding on desperately to a relationship with someone else that is obviously not working, while totally letting go of the most important relationship we will ever have…the one with ourselves. And, here we are totally ignoring our relationship with Self simply because we think that another person, outside of ourselves, is the one that will make life perfect for us. Well, I’m here to tell you that the one that makes life perfect for you…IS YOU. Nobody else can do that for you…EVER. Now, I’m not saying that we’re meant to be loners all of our lives, simply that we’re meant to come together for a very different reason…and one that does not look even remotely close to what we think it does.

We get so mad when our partners and friends don’t see us for who we are. Hell, when all we do is wear masks all day, trying to be what we think the other person will like, how could they possibly know us for who we are? Really. We’re too afraid that we won’t be liked, won’t be accepted, won’t be Loved…so we try to be something to ensure that we will.

We get so made when our partners don’t behave the way we want them to behave. Well of course they’re not, and it’s not fair to force them too. And besides, why should they? The only reason why we want them to is so that we can feel better about our own ideas and judgments about ourselves. Not fair at all. Because even when the other person does respond to our NEEDY request we often find something else about them that needs to be changed. How about we simply change ourselves to realize that everything we will ever need lives inside of us. We do not need another person to do or be anything else. And when we stop making them be something we want them to be, allowing them to Be what they want to be, maybe then we’ll see them for who they really are…as well as see ourselves for who we really are.

Love. It goes a long way…all the way actually. It enables us to share with others who we Truly are while others share what they Truly are, free of judgments.

Love. It bridges gaps and brings people together in ways we could have never dreamed.

Love. It’s all we need because everything lives within it. Love, Universe, God, Holy Spirit…is everything…and we are not part of it, WE ARE IT.

Love holds NO requirements. None! If you need someone to Be a certain way before you ‘love’ them or ‘be friends’ with them…than you’re not in a loving space at all. At that point, you are using them to fill your own false ideas so that you can feel better about yourself.

Love. There’s the smile. There’s the warmth. There’s the joy. There’s the bliss.

Love.

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Have you ever stopped to notice that choices directly affect experience? So, naturally, that means that experience is a direct reflection of choice. Are you listening? Do you get it? Your experience…at work, at play, in relationships, in family, in LIFE is a direct reflection of the choices you make.

I hear the skeptics. I hear people respond by saying “I did NOT choose this experience, it sucks! I wanted happiness, abundance, love, etc. What I’m experience is definitely not what I wanted!”

Oh how funny we are. We never stop to look at the real choice we are making. We think we are making a choice when are mind says “Yes, I want that.” But what’s really happening is that our thoughts are simply that, our thoughts…the belief that lives underneath the thought, in the pit of our stomachs and in our hearts, is the actual choice we are making.

So, even if we say “Yes, I want that” and all the while we are believing “I’m not really good enough” or “I can’t do that” or even “There’s no way that’s going to happen” we will experience the belief, not the thought. I don’t care how many times you repeat that thought over and over…but yet you are repeating (and actually choosing) the belief over and over…guess what…your experience will directly reflect the choice of the belief.

Take a look at the experiences in your life… what you consider the good ones as well as what you consider to be the bad ones. Now look at the belief that was actually underlying those experiences. You go to work, a job that you hate, and wonder why the day literally sucks. You’ve already made the choice…that work sucks. Hence, you will experience exactly that. You go to a party, one you’re looking forward to, and you have a great time. You’ve already made the choice…that the party will be fun. Hence, you experience exactly that. You enter into a relationship, you think they will provide the stability you need and you wonder why that person only seems to get more unstable by the day and nothing in your life is stable. You’ve already made the choice that you yourself need someone else to provide it for you because you just can’t do it by yourself. Hence, you experience exactly that…instability. You apply for a job, you wonder if you are really capable of doing the job, you get the job but at a very low salary. You’ve already made the choice that you really aren’t enough to do the job and aren’t worth that much money. Hence you experience exactly that. So yes, the mediocre experience that you are having…YOU are actually choosing it. And in the same breath, the amazing experience you are having…YOU are actually choosing it.

Do you get my drift? If not, I can continue with examples. Really…take a very close look at what you are choosing…REALLY…and then notice how it directly reflects your experience. Don’t just stop at the thought, move deeper into what is really underlying the thought. Every single experience is connected to every single choice. Even when we don’t realize we are choosing…we are absolutely choosing. By being aware of the choices we make we have the opportunity to change them. Ah yes…but do you have the courage to change them? Where does the fear lie? Is it in the space where you are scared to death if you show your true self to your partner that they will leave you? What happens if they leave? What do you ‘lose’? It’s in acknowledging that fear that lets you see just how you are still CHOOSING to fill that need outside of yourself. And as long as you believe you don’t have it within you…you will experience exactly that.

Every experience. Every choice. Directly connected. What are you choosing…and why?

Do you REALLY want to have a different experience in life? Maybe it’s just in one or two aspects of your life. Where ever it is that you would like a different experience, understand and know that you, and ONLY you, are the one that can change it. You, and ONLY you, can determine your experience. Nobody else has a hand in your experience. NOBODY. You can not blame or thank anyone else for your experience. They may give you an opportunity…but only YOU can choose to do with it what YOU want. 

Experience and choice…directly connected…do you get it? Can you see it? This is your world. This is YOUR experience. You have the knowledge, power and ability to create your own experience. Oh, there it is again…create your own. You are the Creator as well as the Createe…and it’s in your choices (beliefs) that the creation is made. Even though we experience that creation in the outer world, it is first created in the inner space of the Soul.

I’m going to say it one more time…just because I get such a rush from knowing how this works and applying it in my world that I want everyone to have as much fun as I am…EXPERIENCE AND CHOICE ARE DIRECTLY CONNECTED. OUR EXPERIENCE IS IMMEDIATELY AND CONSTANTLY AFFECTED BY OUR CHOICES.

What will you choose now? Have fun!

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So often we trap ourselves in tunnel vision…thinking that there is only one or two ways (at best) for a situation to unfold. Speaking from experience, there is definitely more than 2 ways to “skin a cat,” if you get my drift. : ) When we step into a situation (and we always do step into it…remember…it’s our choice, and if we’re in a situation it’s because we choose to be there.) we have a habit of seeing only what we’ve been taught to see, or experienced previously. Neither of those visions express the full extent of the situation. Both are very upper level or surface ideas about what is taking place.

Until we take the opportunity, the time, to look beneath or beyond the vision or idea we have, we will never fully understand the reason behind what we are looking at. And…we will never fully experience the situation/opportunity right in front of us.

Allowing for the possibility of more means simply opening up the tunnel vision. And, that’s all we have to do…just open the door. Knowing that there is more to be experienced, even if we don’t know what that more is or how it will get here, is the key. Just sit in the knowing. Just sit in the space of “My brain might not know what that more is, but my Soul sure does and when the time is right the more will be shown to me.” And from there just simply walk through the door that opens.

Our human brains don’t always go deep enough into our True Beings for understanding. They have a tendency to stay at the surface and hash through all the ‘garbage’ that’s already there…all the other old ideas and habits that perhaps worked at one time, but no longer work. Take the time to simply allow…to not get stuck in tunnel vision. And so what if you don’t see another vision at this moment…just allow that it is there even if you can’t see it. Breathe. Relax. It is there…and it will show itself when given the opportunity.

Allow for the possibility that YOU are more…that your life is more…that the situations you are in carry more. Allow for the possibility that the person standing next to you is more. And then remember that what you see in them is simply a reflection of your own beliefs, ideas and images…and move past your own judgment when they do not feel the same way about your beliefs and ideas as you do. Heck, you don’t feel the same about theirs, so why the need for them to believe in yours?

Remember that we are not our situations, our ideas, our illnesses, our issues…but that we Are Divine, unlimited, perfect, unique, amazingly spiritual Beings. We are so much more, but if we continually stand in the belief/idea of “I can’t” then we will never get to experience all that we Truly Are. Give yourself a break…open the door to your Soul and allow it to express fully through the beautiful and unique physical body that you are borrowing.

Enjoy the day. Enjoy the moment. Take the time to step into more…you won’t be disappointed.

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Are you still feeling the effects of the 3 eclipses?

Have you noticed yet the opportunities to see deeper into yourself? I mean those opportunities are always there, but the vibration the eclipses brought are really bring our junk to the surface. Are you using those opportunities to understand yourself a bit better?

Seems lately more and more people are looking at their fears. They are noticing how those fears affect their entire lives, not just a portion of their life. One fear, one belief, influences every single choice we make. It only takes one fear to take our life from fab to mediocre. The question is will we make the choice to release that fear and choose something different?

Our Soul gives us the opportunity every moment to shift that fear. We give ourselves the chance to see exactly what we are doing and how to change it several times throughout the day. Sometimes the problem is that we’ve been choosing through the fear for so long that we no longer recognize when we are receiving the signals that we’re doing it.

Pay attention to what your body is telling you. How do you feel? What is happening in front of you? Do you find yourself frustrated, angry, defensive, shut down…yet again? Do you find yourself looking at the same issues…yet again? Those right there, they are your cues. They are your signs to stop what you are doing and breathe.

When you find yourself in a state of flux…and your body will absolutely let you know…stop and ask yourself why you are choosing to respond that particular way to the situation. If you are honest with yourself you will discover that there is a very old ‘less-than’ belief about yourself deep within your mind. It is that belief that drives the reaction, the response, the choice.

By stopping and looking at it, by becoming aware of it, you have the opportunity to choose a different response, a different expression, a different choice. A different expression…one that resonates with who you Truly are, instead of one that shows only a part of your Truth and all of your fear.

Have you ever noticed that the moment you doubt yourself you step into the situation only part way? Part way indicates that you are not expressing yourself fully. Part way indicates mediocre. Mediocre indicates you are not living a full life. Mediocre means that instead of choosing to express yourself 100%, you are CHOOSING to only express through your fear.

Have you ever been doing something and you feel like you’re on cloud 9? You have no doubts about what you are doing, how you are doing it…you simply are having fun and this is blissful? That is you expressing at 100%. Now, imagine being like that every moment of your life. Imagine living that bliss…that happiness…that joy…ALL of the time.

How do you do it? By CHOOSING to express YOURSELF 100%…all of the time. If your life is feeling mediocre…whether you want to accept that it is or not…than you are CHOOSING to express your fears…instead of your True self.

Remember, nobody else can make you choose, whether you are choosing mediocre or something else. Only you can make your choices. There is nobody else that drives your choices. ONLY YOU. Take the opportunity today, right now, to move out of the fear that ‘you can’t’, ‘I’m wrong’ or any other excuse you can find…and shift into Love. Shift into Life. Shift into YOU…the True you. Personally, I think mediocre sucks and I’m not choosing it anymore.

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